Wednesday, 21 April 2010

Heavenly Social Networking or, To Hell With It.


Not very long ago I was going through my daily dose of entertainment, the newspaper, when I came across the story of a Delhi-based businessman who has hired a lawyer to draw up his ‘Digital Will’.

No, no, don't get all excited about a new million dollar business opportunity Mr. Premji & Mr. Murthy, it is not a soft copy of his will. Instead it has instructions to access to his various e-mail accounts after his death! I am not kidding – read the whole story here.

The businessman, who also paints, has different email accounts and he has bequeathed each account to his nominees. While one account has all his artistic works, another has his collection of audio recordings and another his autobiography,’ the article says. 

For a long moment, all I could say was, HUH?! But no, I didn’t stop at that. I went one step ahead and drew up my Social Networking Will in addition to my Digital Will. Apart from my log in and password details, my Will has a whole bunch of messages with detailed instructions to my Digital Heir to upload them everyday for the next fifty years or until all my Facebook friends and Twitter followers die, whichever is earlier. (There is a chance that, inspired by me, all my friends and followers will also draw up similar wills and my social network will become immortal and remain active until the end of time, FB/Twitter or the internet.)

I am already on the job, and here’s my first bank of updates/tweets:

1 Sent Peter on an errand.
2 Smoking might be hell but it can’t kill you here.
3 I donated my body to science. That’s my eyes you are reading with.
4 I’ve just had an out of the soul experience.
5 The sun always shines in heaven. And that’s turning me into an insomniac.
6 You won’t believe the chicks around here! I wish they had bodies though.
7 I got a promotion. I am coming back as a fly on Penelope Cruz’s wall.
8 Deven and Marilyn Monroe are now friends.
9 JFK wrote something on Deven’s wall.
10 Deven defeated Al Capone in Mafia Wars.
11 Deven became an Admin in the Group ‘Forever FBI’.
12 Deven joined the Group ‘Angels against Heavenly Warming – Plug the Hole in the Hell Layer’.
13 Deven is attending the Event ‘I will not pay 5 Heaven Dollars to access FB’.

I suggest you draw up your Digital Will too. Like the digital saying goes, ‘Out of Facebook is out of mind,’ and why should something as stupid as death make your friends forget you, or kill your social networking life?

(Yes. There is a Hell version too. I am working on it. I will keep you 'posted'.)

2 comments:

  1. Deven and Marilyn Monroe are now friends..can happen only in heaven.

    Laughed the loudest @ I got a promotion. I am coming back as a fly on Penelope Cruz’s wall.

    Psst did she swat you?

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  2. You had me in splits here...wonder how my Digital Will would look like?

    1.Varsh sent Chetan Bhagat a slap for writing baseless novels.
    2.Varsh wrote on Brendan Fraser's wall

    :P :P

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